Bad Tuesday

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

Suicide would be such an easier way out...if it didn't mess up so many lives.

Everybody has bad in their lives...why do you hold onto bad things from the past? You need to let it all go and let me love you. Come sleep with me tonight and make sex.

This is all your fault. I've never done anything wrong. Its all your imagination.

Mary? Mary's mother died and she asked me for $700, then asked for more. She's after me I think. We have never eaten together or gone out. You're the love of my life. (caught red handed with all her pics on his phone)

That was all tonight...because...he was backpeddeling. I saw debris on the hall floor. It was across from a hole in the baseboard. Nabal drunkenly fired the 12 gauge in his room! WTF!!?! He gave a big grin, threw up his hands- shit happens, and giggled. I lit into him and he just kept grinning. "Why are you so upset? It was a mistake. All the could have that didn't happen."

Our daughter and several of our children's friends, young women and men, were downstairs watching a movie. Right below where the hole was. Thank you Lord no one got hurt!

Oh how I could have throttled him. He got mad....at me! Oh like you're so perfect. Its the boy's fault. I didn't know the gun was loaded. I don't know anything about guns. (lie) The law says you can't have a loaded gun in the house. (lie) I was sober. (lie) I was going to shoot the fox that killed my chickens. "Look, look it went through the wall, through the bathroom, shot marred the venetian blinds. And it didn't break the window! (he smiled proudly)

So you pulled the trigger on an empty gun? You were going to shot a fox? In the city limits? With an empty gun? What? Were you going too throw the gun at the fox?
Nabal: change subject. Begin alluding to secrets you could divulge if anyone continues to press him. You are making a little mistake into something big...

Texts:
To Mary- I like you a lot.
To Isela- por k tu eres mi 1 amor.

Here we are, back at the beginning...

Collecting divorce lawyer numbers!

Oh, tried again to 'order' me to stop working and stay at home.

I needed to start drinking and drugging with him...or he can come to church with me. You know...we need things in common..!

He can stop drinking- "I'd get pretty strict with you and be mean...but if that's what I want."

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
So this is all I have to say

'Suicide is Painless'

You know...everyone has problems.

Classic response: lie, change the subject, deflect, blame shift, threaten to tell secrets.

When I went into the bathroom her shut the door and blocked it. The look on his face...he wanted to hit me, but was trying to get me to start the violence. I sat down on the tub across the room. Our son finally opened the door. Nabal accused him of breaking into the bathroom and interfering. I could see the want in Nabal's face. The want to hit his son.

Later he brought up the subject over and over. He is never going to do anything for his son again. Nabal looked at me and said, "He hates you. He doesn't care about you. I'm the only one who does."