Monday

Nabal just puked all over my bathroom down here in the basement. He wiped most of it up, but it went all over the place... It was the end of a night of  mind f"#%ery. I've just been tired of repeating the same old crap over and over, so I haven't been writing. I give Nabal credit for staying sober most of last week. Credit in that I mention all he does wrong so I should mention what he got right, because if this ever comes to evidence it needs to be as balanced as I can be.  Damn! Not I have to disinfect the damn bathroom here this late at night... At least he went and passed the heck out.

Today he's been saying I love yous all day. We all figured out why he's being so mister good husband/father. He wants to parade all of us to his church for their 'Thanksgiving' dinner on the 17th. Tonight he repeatedly asked if I was going. I'm working kids are working. He actually asked me if I couldn't make some time for him. I just think when he says things like that about all the times he couldn't 'make time' for any of his kid's big days. My flip moment tonight was when he repeated that he wished he could make enough money to make me happy. Implying that all my actions: sleepin on a couch in the basement, seep rating myself from him all this he says is because he can't make enough money to keep my attention. I called him on it, and I wasn't nice about it. He said it so sweetly, and with a big smile. I told him I was not his mother, waiting around for money, nor does money abundance or lack, color my feelings about people in general. Let's see... What other tactics did he use tonight. Saying his will was stronger than mine and he would make me be his again, his way. I was his little lady and I couldn't change that. Telling me he has powers. (yes...)

When our son got home Nabal was telling him a story. The story followed a crack the boy made about Nabal being wasted and basically said he'd been on crack. Nabal proceeded to tell the 18 year old, his son, about buying crack on a job here in town. He was buying it for a friend since he could get good prices from the dealer who was another worker on the job site who used his own product. Then told how the guy he bought it for, a business owner Ronald, had hurt himself while high on it. Yes and Nabal is still telling everyone else they are practicing Christianity incorrectly. Yup, why neither of the kids has any thing to do with Christianity. He was lecturing me tonight about being filled with the Holy Spirit. Somehow he forgot the part that says being drunk interferes with that... The Thomas Jefferson Christian, all parts that he doesn't like, he conveniently decides are not for him.

What else did this fun night hold...? Oh! He wasn't a motorcycle... Wants me to ride with him. Heck, I won't ride in a car with him! There was something else also... Nabal told me he has never once been mean to me and I'm the mean one, always have been. Why? Because I won't put up with his crap. Oh! Now he claims never to have  chased any other women. Dared me to name one. So I bit, named Mary. He said she was never his lady. She must have turned him down when he asked her to be his girlfriend. Than said I must think he is some hot guy that all the women want. Nope, but I think he's a skirt chaser. Then he claims he had chances I had no knowledge of and I didn't know everything. I played along and told him he didn't know what I knew but just didn't talk about. The look on his face, priceless! Then he said: Women always think they know everything. Well enough of the looser, it all bores me these days. I don't even talk about it to people anymore. I'm just wishing it was all over.

Nabal said he drank a soda today and it made him sick. Said the soda was bad... Last week when he wasn't drinking I really think he was feeling bad. He looked like he was in pain after he drank so much one night last week. I think he knows he's killing himself. He will be sick tomorrow. He never ate his dinner, he forgot. Too busy drinking. Oh well. I hate to even realize it, but I'm past caring.